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February 2013 Newsletter From The Marriage Education and Resource Center (MERCY) |
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Greetings! |
He was funny. She was serious. She was disorganized. He was orderly and everything was in its place. “Just leave the dishes until the morning,” she thought. He, on the other hand, had to have everything put away before bed. She was high-strung and argumentative. He was the even-tempered peacemaker.
In the beginning, their differences attracted them to one another. After a while, what attracted them, began to drive them crazy. As a result, they began to attack one another because of these differences.
We each think our way is the best way and when we don’t agree
then naturally they need to change. But we need to value our differences. God has given each of us freedom to choose and in turn, we need to give each other the freedom to be different. It doesn’t mean we will always like the other person’s behavior or response, but it gives us an opportunity to minister to our mate, develop understanding and adjust our attitudes.
All of us have strengths and weaknesses in our personalities and lifestyle patterns. When we can stop focusing on the negatives the differences cause and instead how they can be strengths, then there will be a lot more harmony in our relationships.
In our upcoming workshop, we will be talking more about personality differences. Won’t you join us? See additional
details below.
Grace and peace,
Penny and David Hudson
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February’s Marriage Tip – Give up the need to be right! |
“Give up the need to be right or fix our loved ones so they are telling the story ‘right’ or doing a chore just the way it’s suppose to be done,or stating a fact accurately, or using correct grammar.”
In Richard Carlson’s book, Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff, he says, “A wonderful, heartfelt strategy for becoming more peaceful and loving is to practice allowing others to be right. Give them the glory. Stop correcting. Let others be ‘right’ most of the time.”
Bea and Jim Strickland
Silicon Valley Better Marriages
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He Led a Double Life by Mary May Larmoyeux |
Scott Jennings never dreamed he would cross the line. but somehow it happened.
He was unhappy at home. He loved Sherry, but . . .well, she was the boss at her work, and she acted like the boss at home. When things needed to be done, she would tell Scott what to do. And he got tired of it.
He wasn’t one to talk about his emotions. So he turned inward. He would escape to the fire station- where he was a volunteer fire fighter – and start drinking.
Things go worse after the Jennings’ son, Steven, was born in 1995. Sherry wanted to be a supermom and Scott was happy to let her do it. Soon he avoided being around Sherry and Steven altogether. If Sherry went to bed early with Steven, Scott stayed up late and watched TV.
He often pretended that a call had come in from the volunteer fire department, but when he left the house he would head to a local bar instead. That’s where he became friends with people who seemed to really understand him.
Scott also turned to a woman at work for a listening ear. Eventually they went to a motel together. He never thought he would be the type of person to cheat on his wife. But he did.
He had stepped into a world of repeated lies, affairs, and deceit. Scott Jennings was living a double life.
This is an excerpt from an article that was on Family Life’s web site. To read the rest of the story,
The Lord is still in the miracle business and using programs like “Weekend to Remember” to make a difference.
In the event you or someone you know could benefit from attending a “Weekend to Remember” there will be one at the Hilton Cincinnati Netherland Plaza, 35 W. 5th Street, Cincinnati, Ohio 45202 on March 8-10, 2013. Whether your marriage, is good, great or in need of help, we think you will benefit from this program.
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Equipping Wives and Mothers |
We love it when we come across new resources to share. In this quarter’s magazine Marriage there was an article called “16 Ways to Flirt With Your Husband” by Sheila Wray Gregoire. Her passion is to equip women to be the best wives and mothers they can be and especially to cultivate marriages that are rock solid.
Shelia blogs daily at:
We’d encourage you to check it out.
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Can You Have a Half Brother? A Must-Read for All Blended Families |
On Shelia Wray Gregoire’s recent blog, she had a guest columnist, Joanne Kraft, who had written an article entitled Can You Have a Half Brother? It’s about blended families and we found it powerful. I want to share with you her opening and then, if you’d like to read the rest of the story go to: http://tolovehonorandvacuum.com/2013/02/can-you-have-half-a-brother/
While speaking at a women’s conference an adorable young mom came up and introduced herself to me. It wasn’t long before we were talking about our family. I asked, “How many children do you have?”
“Three.” She smiled. “My nine year old son is from my husband’s first marriage. Our seven year old and five year old daughters are our biological children.”
I wanted to cry. This sweet gal, without knowing, it had touched a tender spot in me. It happens quite often, actually. If I owned a soap box, I’d climb high above the crowd to shout about labeling children in a blended family. While it was great she called her “un” biological child her son, she set him apart from the rest of the family and told me he was different.
Why does this pain me so?
Because our family is blended. We come from broken beginnings.
According to national statistics, 48% of all families will end in divorce. From that number, 79% of the adults will remarry two and even three times. There are 35 million Americans in the US today who are remarried. There are an additional 36 million Americans who are divorced or widowed. (US Census, 2007) 1 out of 3 Americans is now a stepparent, a stepchild, a stepsibling, or some other member of a stepfamily -a mismatched, disjointed motley crew of people trying very hard to be a family.
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Tearing Down Illusions In Our Marriage – With Kingdom Knotted Ministries |
At this workshop you will be exploring your inner expectations of self, partner, and of those who influence one’s marriages (family, friends, career) in this six session series.
What did I see marriage as prior to our wedding? What is marriage like now? Do my previous expectations meet my current lifestyle? Am I satisfied? Or do I feel disillusioned?
February 27, 2013 at 6:30 p.m. – 8:30 p.m.
Free Public Library (Iroquois Branch; 601 West Woodlawn Avenue, Louisville, Kentucky, 40215) Located in the Lower Level.
For additional information, go to www.kingdomknotted.com
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How to Identify, Accept and Value our Personality Differences Using the Real Colors Program |
While there are no magic bullets for ensuring meaningful and lasting relationships, there are a number of lenses through which a clearer picture of potentially positive relationships can be developed. Real Colors, the program this workshop is based on, is a simple, intuitive system for identifying the four temperaments common to all people.
It provides an effective tool for understanding human behavior, for uncovering motivators specific to each temperament and for improving communication skills. Join us to learn more about Real Colors and how to use in your interactions with your loved ones.
March 9, from 9:30 – 11:00 a.m.
2nd Floor Conference Room
Baptist Hospital Northeast
1025 New Moody Lane
Irene Justiniano, Business Consultant with Humana, will be our presenter.
We’re looking forward to Irene being with us.
There is no charge for the workshop, however, donations are always appreciated. Registration is requested, but not required. To pre-register, call (502) 939-0121; email: pdhud9@aol.com
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Kentucky Marriage Movements Upcoming Events |
The Kentucky Marriage Movement will be offering the following marriage events in March:
Art of Marriage Video Conference
March 8-9 – Catalyst Christian Church, Nicholsville, KY
March 15-16 – Woodford Community Church, Versailles, KY
Love and Respect Video Conference
March 22-23 – Broadway Christian Church, Lexington, KY
These conferences are Fridays from 6:00 – 10:00 p.m. and Saturdays from 8:00 a.m. – 1:30 p.m.
Cost: $15 per person; $30 per couple
Note to Pastors/Marriage Church Leaders: If you would like to bring one of these conferences (Art of Marriage, Love and Respect or Love and Lordship ‘Live’ Marriage event, which is in the works,) to your congregation, please get in touch with Greg Williams with The Kentucky Marriage Movement at 859-255-5400 or email him at: greg@kentuckyfamily.org
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Retrouvaille – A Lifeline for Troubled Marriages |
If you are struggling in your marriage, please consider going to Retrouvaille. We have heard testimony after testimony of couples who were on the brink of divorce who went to this program and it saved their marriage.
The next nearest one in our area is scheduled for the weekend of April 5, 2013 in Cincinnati, Ohio.
For additional information on Retrouvaille please go to www.retrouvaille.org or to register for this event, call Mike and Cathy McNamee at 513-456-5413.
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Save the Date – Ultimate Date Night with Kenn Kington |
You will want to be with us at Crestwood Baptist Church on May 17 for an
Ultimate Date Night with Comedian Kenn Kington. So mark your calendars today and pass the word along to your friends.
More details will be coming soon.
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These are just some of the events and helps that are available. Please check out our web site for additional marriage programs, helps and resources at www.kymrc.com Or, if you have any suggestions, comments, questions, or we can personally help you in any way, please give us a call at (502) 939-0121 or email us: pdhud9@aol.com We’d love to hear from you.
Sincerely,
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Penny and David Hudson
The Marriage Education and Resource Center (MERCY)
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