Recognize, Stop and Figure it Out

shutterstock_61791019 exit couple

We know lots of relationships skills and we know when we use them they make all the difference in the world.  We just have to buckle down and use them.  We did that today.  We worked through an issue using several of the skills we have learned over the years.  It was a great experience and we each took ownership of how we contributed to the problem and what we were each willing to do about it.

I don’t have space here to explain the specifics so I’ll give you the basics and, if interested, you can google and read more about them and try these techniques to see if they don’t work for you.  Try them.  We think you will like them.  The tools we used were first, understanding what the experts call the “Fear Cycle.”  Then, identifying what’s behind the fear.  After that, we talked through our reactions using “I” messages and reflective listening.  After we had a good understanding of where the other was coming from, we used the ten-step plan for problem solving.  Ta Da = issue resolved and we are happy campers.

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